Why things have been slow

I was thinking about what I would say in this journal today though this has been on my mind for quite some time now.  Why have I been cranking out art at a slower-than-normal rate lately?  Well there's a number of things that have kept me from doing it:

1.  Laziness.

I admit, I haven't been quite so hardworking as I used to when it comes to my art.  A mixture of con-prep during the summer, being distracted by Pokemon Go, holidays, family, and other stuff, it's been hard for me to stick to my schedule.  Whenever I have time, it just seems to go towards something else and then I realize I wasted all my time on that thing without using it wisely cuz other things pop up or I have to go to my job or something.  I've had this problem for a while but this year it seems to have gotten worse.  This has to change soon cuz I've been slacking off on my commissions which is part of the reason why you don't see me post so many journals announcing that I am open for them anymore because I don't have as much free time as I used to with my job and everything, and also because I just know it's going to pile more on me and keep me from getting things done as fast as I would like.  I almost want to just close temporarily for several months to see if I can catch up but I am not sure if that is a good idea since I will be needing money for the next few months with taxes coming up.  I might be able to since my hours at work have gone up and I make more in a month than I used to, but I dunno.  I might try this after the holiday list is complete.  Again, if anyone is interested, the holiday discount (everything is 20% off) will end as soon as December ends so send a note now if you are interested.

2.  Lack of motivation for pony

I know, I can't believe it either.  I dunno, I just haven't been as crazy about the show as I used to.  Back when the show first came out, I used to be obsessed and devoted sooooo much time to this fandom, now it's just simply my favorite show.  Now don't get me wrong, I still LOVE the show, I honestly do, but things seem to have been slow with the fandom lately and that seems to have affected me too.  I want to keep doing MLP-related content though because the brony fandom is a wonderful place and I have such great friends here.  I have said before how I want to be able to draw other things than MLP and you see I have been drawing some Pokemon fanart lately as well as some pics of my OC, Emi.  Again, I still want to keep doing MLP art, but I still want to branch out with other art.  Right now the non-MLP thing that interests me most is Pokemon so you may see more of that but I will keep up with MLP as best I can.  I really really want to at least keep doing my story Age of the Alicorns: Chaos Rising as well as the Ask Accord blog for sure.  What saddens me most is the show itself doesn't seem to have as much of a grasp on me either.  Like, I only watch some episodes once now.  It didn't used to be that way, I used to watch the episodes like 5x in a row after they aired but now there are a few times when I only watched an episode once and it wasn't that interesting so I never saw it again or it was interesting and I said I would rewatch it but that never happened.  Maybe my love for the show will be rekindled when the movie comes out or something.  For now, things just kinda seem stagnant for me with pony...

3.  Haven't been so successful with making a living off of my art

I have found that trying to make a living off of my MLP art is becoming more and more of a waste of time and effort as time goes on.  I am still able to get some people interested in buying commissions from me but not at as high of a rate as I used to (partly because I've been lightening my load due to having a job now) but I tried earlier this year to open up for sculpture commissions as well as opening up an Etsy and neither of those went well at all.  I remember when I said how I wanted to make so many chibi pony sculptures but after I made Applejack and no one was interested in buying her, this demotivated me from making more and that disaster with my Discord sculpture that went to Denmark makes me never want to sell another sculpture.  I have a severe lack of motivation when it comes to sculptures now and Etsy was quite a fail.  Same applies for Ebay though that was different in being that I was selling old toys on my account though somehow that didn't work out too well either.  I dunno what it is but I think I am having the same problem SilverSlinger is having: we just can't get people in the fandom interested in our art anymore.  It's happening to other people too I see.  People in the fandom are reporting lower sales in art at conventions and convention attendance seems to be dropping.  This could be, in part, due to off-season hiatuses or the fact that some cons have moved their events to different times of the year which kept some people from attending like with BronyCon this past summer, but other than that, I think the brony fandom is just getting a lot more stagnant as well.  I can't say its' "dying" necessarily, but it sure is not growing as fast as it used to.  This has affected how well I perform at cons when selling.  I've improved since last year obviously but my sales didn't increase as much as I wanted them to and I had way too many prints and buttons left over that no one seems to want so far.  They are still available if you are interested (and only if you live in the US since I can't trust overseas shipping anymore) and I still have yet to post my 11x17 posters but those may go on sale as well unless I feel I should keep them all for when the next con comes.

4.  I feel art shouldn't be my job

I dunno how else to put it but I feel like art should just be a hobby for me.  I mean I want to see if I can still sell at some cons, things seem to be getting better with TrotCon and FillyCon might see an increase in attendance next year, but at some point I am probably going to want to stop selling at cons.  As I said earlier, I am not that good with them and I can't help but feel I am being called to other things too.  Remember when I said earlier this year how I have an original idea I wanted to make into a video game?  Well, there's been a slight change of plans but I do still plan on using that someday and I will be sure to keep you all updated on that.  Point being, I feel like making a living off of my art is sucking out all the originality that it once had back when I just did it for fun.  Commissions started out well but now it's like I'm just making it to make money and that doesn't feel right.  What will be my future career instead?  Well we'll have to wait and see.  It could actually be art-related, who knows, but my conscience is telling me that God has bigger plans for me...

5.  My desire to be well-known is dying

You know what.....this one is going to take forever.  I'll talk about it in the next journal.  Stay tuned, it will be up shortly...